ou’ve probably heard that saying by Dorothy Parker about writing: “I hate writing. I love having written.” It’s the same with me and moving. “I hate moving. I love having moved.” I hate the fact that our house is turned upside down before the move. I hate the juggle of trying to fit in last minute adventures and saying goodbye to friends while also making sure all the To Do List tasks get completed. (Oh, and I hate those goodbyes, too.) I hate the stressful last 24 hours when we’re trying to get everything absolutely clean and packed away, racing against the clock before we do our walk-through with the landlord.
But once all that stuff is behind us? I can honestly say I love having moved. I love the satisfaction of looking at an empty apartment knowing that WE DID IT. I love the feeling of having tackled the beast and getting another imaginary “I’m an adult” badge for our imaginary sashes. I love getting road trip time with Bobby, heading to our next adventure. I love exploring our new home – or saying hello, once again, to a familiar place as is the case with our summer and fall in Vermont. I love looking around our new home and brainstorming new projects to fill the spaces.
As we were undergoing this last move out of Miami, my sister suggested that I keep tabs on any moving tips and tricks and write about them. Each time we move, I do think we get a little bit better and slightly more effective. Here’s what I learned this time around:
1) JUST SAY YES TO MULTI-TASKING.
I get easily overwhelmed with moving. It’s a mammoth task, particularly at the beginning when I’m staring at a complete, lived-in home and know that EVERYTHING has to be dismantled. My only rule for myself during this stage is, “Just keep moving.” (Pun semi-intended.) If my motivation starts to flag on one task or I get stuck because I just don’t want to think about sorting all those papers/craft supplies/kitchen tools at that present moment, I allow myself to move on to another task. Yep, I just leave half-finished tasks all over the house.
I’ve realized that if I force myself to do these tasks start to finish, it feels like drudgery and takes me twice as long than it does when I’m in the zone. Ultimately, it ALL needs to get finished, so having multiple things on the go is fine. Better to keep moving and start on another task than feel stuck or plop on the couch and watch Parks and Rec for the next several hours (I won’t say I wasn’t tempted…).
2) JUST SAY NO TO MULTI-TASKING.
It’s opposite day! I know this is completely contrary to the advice I JUST wrote for rule number one. Here’s the deal, though: it’s all about where you are on the moving timeline. In the beginning stages, I give myself total permission to flit around from task to task. When it gets down to crunch time, I shift gears and this becomes the law of the land.
Bobby can be credited with this approach – when we got down to our final few days in Miami, he suggested we go room by room. It turned out to be a genius idea. We systematically started on our top floor in the farthest room – the bathroom – and got everything out and in boxes. We cleaned everything so that it sparkled. Then we didn’t step foot in that room again. After that, we moved on to the room next to that one and continued in this fashion throughout our whole apartment. By the end of this, we were basically sleeping on a blow up mattress in the kitchen, but that was fine.
Put your head down, and grind out one room at a time. It works wonders.
3) START THE DEEP CLEANING EARLY.
Not to brag or anything, but I’m really good at deep cleaning. When I was little, I used to love cleaning the baseboards of our house while rocking out to James Taylor on the cassette player walkman (I’ve been an old soul for a long time). I still love rocking out to James Taylor, and I still get immense satisfaction from staring at a clean baseboard or a spotless fridge. I try to tackle spots that even most professional cleaning people might gloss over – like in between the slats of our closet doors:
Bobby and I are INTENSE about getting our security deposits back so deep cleaning always happens. I would so much rather put in hours of elbow grease and get thousands of dollars back than do a lackluster job and possibly leave money on the table. The timing of that deep cleaning is going to start changing, however.
I’ve always left the deep cleaning to the very last week. After all, you want it to be spick and span when the landlord walks through, right? As I was scrubbing away dust with an old toothbrush, though, I started to realize that I could have boosted our happiness levels by doing this deep cleaning at least a month before we actually moved. This would have had two huge positive effects: we would have had time to actually enjoy the fruits of my labor and I could have spaced out tasks and done one per day instead of feeling like a cleaning machine during the last few days.
We still would have been left with some surface-level cleaning at the end, but it would have been fast and painless. Definitely implementing this rule for our next move.
4) BE OKAY WITH THINGS LEFT UNDONE.
You are not Superwoman/man. And that’s okay. I had SO many plans to get together with people “one last time” before we left. We were going to have people over for drinks, go out for coffee with some of the friends we made in Miami, host a themed-dinner, go on a date to listen to Thursday night music at the bookstore. So many plans! None of them happened!
Bobby and I even had plans to go on a day trip to the Florida Keys a couple days before we pulled out of Miami. We hadn’t been to the Keys all winter – it was so close, how could we pass up that opportunity? Because it would have been insanity, that’s why. We scrapped the plan as we started to realize that it just wasn’t going to be relaxing. Yes, we could have checked something off the bucket list – but we would have sacrificed our peace of mind and brought in excess stress for our final move-out day. Not worth it.
I continue to grow in this area, giving myself more grace and leeway with each move. It’s made a big difference.
5) BE KIND.
This is a rule for life, really – but moving, too. Kindness begets kindness and that kind of karma can be invaluable during a move.
Allow me to illustrate: Bobby and I had rented a second floor storage unit because it was significantly less expensive. Over the phone, we had been told that there were stairs going up to the unit. We had our pallets to move from our pallet bed and pallet couch – so it wouldn’t be the easiest task to navigate those up stairs but it also was far from impossible. Definitely worth the savings. (May I point out that Bobby and I are quickly becoming storage unit connoisseurs? We are kind of collecting them across the country…one in New Orleans…this one in Miami…certain things stored with both sets of our lovely parents in North Carolina and South Dakota. Rest assured, there is a method to our madness even if it sounds crazy.)
Well, when we arrived at the storage unit in person, we realized that the “stairs” were actually a moving step ladder with a broken lock mechanism. Bobby still thought we should go for it. Here’s where kindness saved the day: we were super nice and agreeable to the man who helped show us the unit. Even when he looked at us like we had lost our minds when we told him most of the unit would be taken up by pallets (“Pallets? You made FURNITURE out of them? I just threw away two pallets this morning!”), we just laughed and joked with him that yes, we may be a little crazy.
We gradually worked out way into Enrique’s heart because when we pulled up with our first load of pallets, he offered to help lift them up to Bobby, thus eliminating the need for the ladder. Amazing! He even helped unload them from the car. On top of this, he invited us to go out to the casino with him which means we are officially friends. (We didn’t take him up on this, but loved the offer nonetheless.) Enrique, we’re your biggest fans!
Basically, being kind paid off in such an unexpected way and made our day so much easier. Kindness can be easy to abandon during the stress that a move brings so I think it’s good to make it into an actual rule. Kindness is where it’s at, friends!
Five simple rules that we’ll be following for future moves – along with these pointers I synthesized last November.
Any rules for moving that you’ve developed? It’s so nice to be back with you all!
So glad to read your post, nice rules to follow and bookmark for future reference,as we will be moving in a couple of months. Hope everything goes well back in Vermont. Sending you a big hug, and hope you can catch some rest. Yes there was a time where humans were nomads, but they used to move slowly from place to place, congrats on the big accomplishment.
You’re so right, Iliana, the speed with which modern moves takes place is a total whirlwind – and so many logistics to figure out! I think I’m FINALLY caught up on rest and getting into the swing of things again. Where will you be moving to shortly? I’ll be thinking of you!
Grace, you are so wise. I loved reading this and I hope you have (had) a wonderful trip up the coast to your new nest. Thanks for the great pointers – we are just moving into a “new” 15-year-old boat (but only for weekends, whew!), and your cleaning ideas are definitely tried and true! I hope you will encounter many kind people in the weeks ahead. xoxo
Martha, thank you for this. The weekend boat house sounds incredible! I’ll be thinking of you as you undertake the move – or perhaps it’s already complete?!
Grace, not only is my hat off to you, but also my shoes, socks, sweatshirt….. better stop there, it’ll creep Bobby out. Yay for you two, I am raising a glass as I write! Xxx
Hahahaha this made me laugh out loud – I read your comment immediately to my mom and she cracked up, too. Thanks for the cheers, it feels great to have the move behind us and great people (like you) sharing in our success with it!
P.s., I was doing the same thing Bobby was doing (only it was Bill handing me up a vacuum cleaner) when my back went out for weeks… Hope he’s ok!
Oh no, is your back okay now, Adrienne? That sounds awful! Hope that all is back to normal!
It’s so good to see you back! To be honest, I checked in a few times (hasn’t it been three weeks already?! I thought)
I’ll have to keep those in mind as I begin to contemplate my trans-Pacific move. Two months away! Perhaps the most problematic being to be okay with things left undone. So easy to say, so hard to do, but so rewarding to realize sooner rather than a stressful later.
Glad you were able to get some help with that second floor unit. That’s such insanity! I remember seeing your snapchats and not quite believing it was a reality.
Also, I totally relate with the deep cleaning. I’ve definitely scrubbed walls and baseboards with a toothbrush before. My family has a history of not getting our deposits back though, thanks to various bleach/ink-on-carpet accidents…
I still have a Walkman cassette player! I bought it high school when NOCCA was getting rid of their cassette tape library and I was able to pick up Professor Longhair and other great artists for free. It is a great cleaning companion.
Good job on your most recent “I’m an adult” badge! :)
Celeste, you’re the sweetest. This totally made my day. :) It’s great to be back with you!
I imagine it will be tough to leave certain things undone – especially when you’re in a country that is so far away…it’s not like you can just take a quick flight or road trip there to partake in adventures that you weren’t able to squeeze in this year. I feel for you. But you can do it and I think you’re calm personality will be a godsend as you make the move (which I have no doubt you’ll do with grace and aplomb).
Love that you still have a Walkman! Whip that baby out and know that I’m sending you all the good vibes as you march ahead in these next two months! xoxo
You managed this move with so much Grace. Hurray for you and Bobby. My two moving rules- when in doubt throw it out and never turn down an offer of help!
Pam, you are right on with those rules! I learned one of those the hard way – when I was doing the final push to move from New Orleans, I didn’t take up a couple friends on their sweet offers to help…and I definitely paid for it in the end! So much more stressful than it could have been had I just said ‘yes’ to them. Lesson learned!